Dear Anat,
It's a hard call to know definately if the CS was needed or not. The best way is to insist on getting your file and going over it with a midwife and obstetrician (perhaps more than one each) and trying to understand what really happended. Of course, it is difficult to find an OB who will be willing to cooperate as this may seem to him to be very uncollegial. As far as episiotomy goes, it is much easier. All evidence suggests there is only one reason to do one, and that is if there is fetal distress and the baby needs to come out right away. Also if you are over 35, first baby, obese , and have a weight estimation of 4 kilo or more. Ilana
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