I had my baby a month ago at home - unplanned but so it happened and I'm glad about it. I wanted a homebirth but wasn't supposed to do it because of some complications. I remember feeling a lot like you, not prepared, that i need more time, and where can I read some more, quickly. finally it's true what the other girls wrote also - no way to prepare for it. during the birth there was no time for candles or music or any of that - it was a speedy race of less than 2 hours, so what I remember as the most helpful was in fact all the birth stories that I read before and the little things, sentences that i took from some of them that stuck in my head. most of all: the advise not to stop my body from what it is doing, but to just let the experience take control over me. it wasn't easy but when i let myself go everything moved very very quickly - very painfully too, ma laasot. also - trying to see it as a positive experience, to feel the sensetion not only as "pain" but also as "force" or "energy", "excitment". well, it only worked for a while... and also the presence and support of my dear benzoog who didn't let me feel how hysterical he was. and one more thing: to think that it will finish and a baby will be there - what a great reward. i know these are simple, maybe stupid things but they helped me.
good luck and i hope you will enjoy it - at least parts of it! (it's possible!)
ibi
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